Joseph’s Story Of Change
In 1988, life seemed picture-perfect for me—I was married and had a great job, a house, and a car. My reputation in the community, with family, and at work was impeccable. Little did I know, one particular day that year would become a turning point, altering the course of my life forever.
On that day, my wife and I were invited to a friend’s house where we encountered cocaine. Despite being almost thirty and having never been around cocaine before, we decided to try it. While my wife seemed unaffected, it hit me differently, triggering a physical, mental, and spiritual war that would persist for years.
Initially, I didn’t yield to consistent drug use, but over time, it became an off-and-on struggle. Despite having a great job as a printing press operator and being well-respected, my focus shifted entirely to cocaine, leading me to quit my job and almost lose everything.
Recognizing the severity of my situation, my wife gave me an ultimatum—choose her or the drugs. Thankfully, I chose her, achieving sobriety for almost a decade. Around forty, I encountered a new form of cocaine in crack, and it took hold of me like nothing had before. That began a twenty-year struggle.
Crack introduced a new level of emotional turmoil fueled by doubt, fear, and confusion. I was unable to concentrate on any one thought, feeling completely distracted and alone, contemplating suicide during my lowest moments.
Understanding the toll my addiction was taking, my wife reached her breaking point, ending our marriage. Despite this loss, she continued to care about me and pray for my health. My entire family situation crumbled and I lost my relationship with my children too.
Many years passed without direction or purpose until I hit rock bottom, realizing the severity of my situation. Alone in my room, I faced the bleak prospect of dying unnoticed. In a desperate search for help, I searched for a treatment center that was centered around God and found Western Carolina Rescue Ministries.
Upon entering the Discipleship and Recovery Program, I was still unfocused but determined to work on myself. Despite discarding drugs, some of my old thought patterns lingered. The ministry displayed patience, even in the face of my pride and anger. Helping me move past my pride and condescending attitude towards others, the ministry saw something salvageable in me.
Though I didn’t notice it at first, people around me saw slight transformations in my interactions and attitudes. Over time, my heart has softened, allowing me to be patient with myself and others. I’ve accepted two key truths: Everyone comes to the ministry broken, and even God’s children have problems.
God is transforming my heart of stone into one of flesh. I no longer want to be mean or condescending; instead, I desire kindness and the opportunity to help without receiving anything in return. Self-sufficiency – a key part of my prior life – is a lie. I’m learning more and more to depend on God.
Now, I have a real relationship with God, stronger than ever. An intimate friendship with God has grown, one where I am aware He knows and understands me. I still have a ways to go, and I know it won’t always be easy. But this is sure: I’ll never be the same again, and it’s all because of Him.
